The Rt. 40 Sales are Coming, Hello Foxy!

The Route 40 yard sales are just around the corner!!! I even added this handy widget to countdown the days to bargain bliss. Luckily my hubby and I just bought a new truck. Say hello to Foxy Brown!

For too long I have been trying to cram shit in the back end of a little Commander, but not any more. Now when I see a great piece of furniture, car hood,..... I can purchase it knowing I have a big bed to put it in. The back seat even folds up to create even more space for "junk".

Yup, I love this truck!! BRING ON THE "JUNK"!!!!!

Gingival Awareness!!! Okay I'm not totally sure that's a word

Yesterday I had to go to the dentist and get my teeth cleaned.

I hate going to the dentist!


I can't stress that enough. It's the sounds and and all the scraping.....aaahhhhh! It's like nails on a chalkboard, but dental hygiene is important to me therefor I go.

I mean, come on people, this smile is the only one I've got. You've gotta maintain yer shit if ya wanna keep it!


Unfortunately........
My check-up didn't go as well as I had hoped.   Deep breath in, exhale...... I have gingivitis!!!! Crying, crying, sobbing.

Okay I'm over dramatizing it a bit and it's not exactly like they portray with the swollen, pussy, funky mess you see when they try and scare little kids into brushing everyday. I basically have swollen gums on my top molars and they bleed easily.... not that scary really, but if left untreated it can lead to other problems even tooth loss.

Now, I can tell you, yes there was some denial. I brush my teeth twice a day, floss religiously because I once saw on Oprah it could add 2 years to my life.....how could I have gingivitis???!!!

Anywho, the dentist prescribed me a whole new regiment.

I now have to use a gum protection toothpaste. I've been prescribed an antibiotic mouthwash that doesn't taste too bad at first, but you let that shit sit in there a while (not allowed to eat or drink anything for an hour after) and the most awful bitter taste you could imagine sets in. It's like suckin' on a sea hag and Martha Stewart would say "it's not a good thing". And last but not least..... I had to buy a new toothbrush.

You're probably thinking this:

But I'm talking this:

I had to buy a Phillips Sonicare (shown in image) and believe me y'all, these are the Cadillacs of toothbrushes.
They had one a Kohl's with a retail price of $250...... a toothbrush!!!!!

Needless to say, I did not buy that toothbrush. I instead opted for the battery powered Sonicare that works fabulously and only had a retail price of $30. I didn't give that of course, mine was on sale and I just happened to have $10 in Kohl's Cash so my Cadillac only set me back 10 buckaroos.

So I'm on my way to gum recovery.

Gingivitis is an ugly word and I used to think  it only happened to people who didn't brush their teeth. I now know different.

I hereby dedicate this post to gingival awareness (if that's really such a thing), because swollen, bleeding gums can happen to good people who brush.

Note: I've never sucked on a sea hag and I'm not sure I even know what one is, it was purely for humor so laugh ya fuck.

I Cried

It was bitter sweet to say the least.

                                          The little farm house I remember

                                           Is now this

I knew it was going to be tough heading back there, but I didn't realize the true weight the impact would hold. Seeing many of the things I remember so vividly from my childhood, all grown up or totally destroyed, rips a bit of your heart out because you know it's never coming back. 

This is what is left of the property my Grandma owned.

This is the property line of Grandma's neighbor Mr. Isaac. The tree has grown up between the fence and pushed it apart

This is Mr. Isaac's chicken coop. The power company must have pushed to the back of the property because it is not where it originally stood. The nesting boxes were still filled with straw as if they were used only yesterday and not twenty years ago.

This is what's left of the back gate to Mr. Isaac's property.

My beloved vine.
One of my fondest memories. The vine is now so big it lays on the ground. When I saw it was still there, I grabbed my husband and I cried.

Grandma's junk pile was still on the property down back by the creek. We got down and dirty, funky with mud, trying to save some of my past.

And I took that fuckin' sink.


I know progress is a part of life. I realize that as the population grows, we must develop to accommodate. But for every old house you tear down, so goes a piece of someone else's life.

The house my child inside remembers is simply that, a memory. I will always relive those days within my mind and let them bring me comfort, but when they tore it down....... they layed to rest part of that little girl, I will never again be.

It's Time to Visit the Ghost

My grandma had a wonderful little farm house with some acreage.

 I remember growing up, we would visit every weekend and all us kids would run down back to the creek to play. Other days we would play in the chicken house, rip rhubarb outta the garden and eat it raw, chase and catch grasshoppers so they would spit in our hands..... gosh, you name it, we did it. Just a bunch of kids having fun on a farm. I even remember swinging on a huge, wild grape vine that was down back by the creek...my dad swung on the same one when he was little.

Runnin' bare foot down the gravel lane to being scared shitless that I would fall in when I had to use the outhouse, these are all memories that I will recount to the day I die. These are some of my fondest thoughts and that is all they are now....thoughts, memories.

Grandma's house is gone.

Industry came to the little farmhouse on Schartz Rd. and tore it down. 

A power grid now stands on the property with numerous other businesses around. The little white chicken house is gone.....
The garden that gave birth to some of the most bitter rhubarb that ever puckered your mouth is concrete....
The outhouse that threatened to swallow me, vanquished by a metal beast.

It's been twenty years or more since I've stepped foot on the property..... I'm going back this Saturday.

My mom got an invite from an old friend to come and visit. Innovation and technology haven't touched her stretch of the road yet, but they are on their way and she needs help clearing out. She told my mom "bring that girl uh yers that likes to ramble". With this invitation, I'm gonna revisit the ghost.

Memories and emotions are gonna come floodin' back. This place helped build who I am. The treasure hunts, ridin' imaginary bicycles, eatin' grandma's rice puddin'....all made the rambler I am today.


It's time to go back and shake hands with the ghost.... to touch the earth where my little feet grew.

I Lack the Discipline

I totally forgot for a while there that I had a blog.

Then it hit me, I just don't think I'm disciplined enough for all this! 


But here I am making another entry about not making an entry............ yeah.

Anyhow, I've got some cool shit going on around me with the mass of junk I have accumulated. I've been steadily working on some pieces to give them a new purpose and just uploading some others because they're great as they are.

I'm pleased as punch, tickled pink, happy as a clam (however happy they are) about the warmer weather that is in the forecast. It inspires me and gives me reason to step outside and play with my junk.

DID YOU KNOW I LOVE JUNK!!!!!

If you haven't gotten that idea already, this post may be the field point that hits the bullseye.

                          And yes, that is a pea soup green car hood in my barn.....I bought it at an estate sale.  

Well, I'm feelin' pretty good 'bout myself for posting another entry, but it's time to go sit my ass on a school bus and get paid, see ya!                                                                                  

Hell, I Sold A Dead Cat...Why Not Tree Cancer?!

One Saturday in the early fall, my hubby and I decided to check out a barn sale in Fletcher, Ohio my mom had told me about. It was just as any other barn sale...shit stacked to the rafters, me salivating... anyhow I noticed this shoe box filled with these large, bulbous, elephant-man looking ... things.

Needless to say, my ass was intrigued! I thought these were just some of the coolest damn things I had ever seen. Whats even sweeter....some other crazy ass also thought they were cool so they climbed into a tree to remove the suckers.

I love shit that defies explanation!!

So what are they you ask?

I asked the old man that was having the sale and he said they were a fungus. I have since looked into this and found out they are Malignant Tree Growths. Don't believe me, look it up. It is essentially a disease that forms these large, bulbous growths and can eventually lead to the fatality of the tree. (That sounded so scientific and brilliant, I can't believe I said it)


So what am I going to do with them....Sell them of course!


I'm sure they could be used for some type of strange project or just do what I did and put 'em in a jar for display.

Who knew tree cancer could be so pretty.

Here's the links to purchase 'em in my shop.
Box of Tree Cancer
Little jar of Tree Cancer
Large jar of Tree Cancer

Even The Bloggess Would Think This Shit is COOL!!!

I was toolin' around on Etsy this morning...ya know just checking out other people's shit and saying oohh, I want that.
And I came across one of the coolest shops on the site, Mammoth Curios.

I have some weird and cooky love for shit that's been stuffed and that is exactly what I found here. I have 2 favorite pieces that I would love to have if the lack of funds weren't a problem.

The 3 Blind Mice...I just want to hug them
http://www.etsy.com/listing/81706778/three-blind-taxidermy-mice

Are these not the cutest things you have ever seen??!!! LOVE THEM!!!


and then there's this guy


The Alligator Lamp...who doesn't need one of these
http://www.etsy.com/listing/81706020/vintage-taxidermy-alligator-lamp?ref=v1_other_2

That's right, no more eye strain during story time...momma's gotta a brand new lamp! See, alligators can be more than just hand bags and boots. They're spreading light throughout the world to stop the nasty battle with illiteracy once and for all.....thank you alligator lamp.


And it doesn't stop there! They have so much great stuff, I just made them one of my favorite stores.

A note to The Bloggess herself:
If you read this you definitely want to check this shop out. I know you share a love for odd taxidermy and believe me, they've got it!